For Those Who Are Beaten
by Kaji Kanoko
Summary: Abuse and neglect were two powerful words that summed up the basics of aggrieved, 14yearold, Kai Hiwatari's life. Suddenly, unexpected events and changes come into play, but it seems as if Kai's pain is deeper than anyone thought. Slight KaiHilary
1. To Be Bruised and Broken

_Phoenix__ Fallen:_ Kon'nichi wa mina-san (or may I just call you minna?); I've finally decided to create a story! Lucky you, huh?

This is my first piece of fanfiction, so I warn you, it might not be so good, but I'm working on it! Also, I might not be able to update so frequently, as I get writers block and access to my computer isn't always possible. Other than that, I'll do my absolute best.

Oh, and I posted this up before (for like, a minute) before ripping it back down again because I had a few errors I hadn't counted on. Gomen nasai. --;;;

And thanks to Aymeleh who reviewed before; you're a quick one, aren't you? But enough of my rambling, ne? Let's get on to the good stuff…

---------

_Disclaimer:_ Aoki-san owns Beyblade. I, on the other hand, do not.

---------

**For Those Who Are Beaten**

_Summary:_ Abuse and neglect were two powerful words that summed up the basics of aggrieved, 14-year-old, Kai Hiwatari's life. But what happens when unending occurrences of unexpectancies arise? Will he summon up the strength to save himself and others? KaiHilary

PG-13 - _Angst_

---------

**Chapter One: To Be Bruised and Broken**

---------

"Worthless piece of filth."

Kai lay motionless on the ground, staring blankly ahead at a shadow cast by his grandfather's broad-shouldered body. It spread lengthily along the delicate, and intricately designed carpet which covered part of the floor in the study, laying a few feet away from him. The last remark stung, but he wasn't about to let it show. Emotions were what made you weak, and any show of weakness was never tolerated.

"Get up."

Slowly, he rolled over, getting ready to push himself to a standing position, when something made contact with the back of his head, shattering from the violent impact. The slate-haired boy was thrown forwards, and he collided with the wall, his knees and open palms landing on shards of the broken vase.

Immediately, he sprung backwards, only to meet a well-aimed kick in the ribs, which sent him nearly half-way across the room. He clenched his teeth, holding back his groans, satisfying himself only with deep, and forced to be calm, breaths, and shutting his eye-lids down tightly, tensing his muscles in his legs.

"Pathetic."

On the inside, Kai flinched. Already at the age of fourteen, and he had had every possible insult imaginable thrown at him. He knew he should be used to it by now, but it still hurt, and he cursed himself for this psychological debility.

"**WHAT - DID - I - SAY?!**" his grandfather's harsh voice demanded, "Stand **UP**!"

Quickly this time, he stumbled to his feet, dizzy and light-headed. The room before him was swimming, and he reluctantly lifted his gaze to look at his guardian's face.

"Get out."

He blinked, taken aback for a moment, and he felt his systems inside grow ice cold. He stood as rigid as ever, frozen in complete and utter shock, staring ahead at the man standing in front of him. Did he... did he hear him correctly?

"Stupid boy," his grandfather snarled, "I said** GET OUT OF MY HOUSE**!"

Kai saw what was going to happen next, but he just didn't seem to have the will to evade it. In one swift motion, his grandfather back-handed him, sending him spinning around to land heavily on the floor, all of the wind knocked out of him. Desperately, he clawed at the wood, scrambling to get up as a hard, solid boot delivered one vicious blow after the other upon his legs and lower torso.

Wincing, he hefted himself to his feet, trying to make a break for the door, only to be pulled back down again by a pair of strong hands which wrapped themselves around his right ankle and tugged abruptly, nearly disconnecting his leg from his hip socket.

As he slammed back down onto the floor, completely breathless, he found himself biting his tongue, and as his jaw was jarred, his teeth came down on it hard, and he could taste the bittersweet flavour of his own blood swimming in his mouth.

"Where do you think you're going? I'm not done with you yet, boy!"

Twisting around, Kai could see his grandfather pulling back on his leg, reeling him in as a fisherman did with his catch. His eyes were glittering maliciously; the pupils contracted to mere dots in his unnatural violet irises, and they were glazed over with a shiny coating, giving them the impression of being diamond hard.

They were always like that; gazing down upon him with the same spiteful look. He never knew why he hated him so much, why so much was expected of him, and why he was beaten like this. It was just the way things were...

_You told me to leave_, he yelled out in his mind, _and I'm going; I'm leaving, so LET GO!_ With his free leg, he kicked out at his guardian, making contact with his chest, and knocking him backwards. In this process, his grandfather's grasp on his ankle was nullified, and he was free to get up.

_The door_, he thought frantically as he awkwardly found a way to stand, _I need to get to the door._

He sprinted over to the great, mahogany structure, placing his hands on the knob in attempt to turn it, but withdrew them in a flash as if it were scorching hot. Suppressing a yelp of surprise and pain, he swore violently under his breath, and a small trickle of blood ran down his jaw from his torn tongue. He swallowed, draining the rest of the rich substance, and looked down at his open palms.

Tiny, delicate pieces of coloured glass were lodged in his skin; some thin, pointed splinters lying under a few layers of tissue, while some chunks of the glittering solid sat stuck deep inside his flesh. They didn't appear only in his hands however, he could see some had ripped through the long, purple gloves that came up his forearms, stopping a few inches below his shoulder.

His red-brown eyes narrowed, and he fought to stop himself from hissing in spite of the stinging sensation.

_Now what?_ he asked himself frantically, _I can't even touch -_

His thoughts were interrupted abruptly as something with a pointed edge found its way through the air and slammed agonizingly against the back of his neck. He turned around, moisture threatening to fall while they clung weakly to the edges of his eyes, and he looked down onto the ground at what lay by his feet: a thick volume; one of many in a series of encyclopedias.

_I thought he loved that collection_, he wondered vaguely, _he spent a lot of money on it too. I remember I used to read these when I was little... they're too precious for him to be just -_

A two other hard-covers came flying at him, this time hitting him in the side of the head, wreaking havoc on his already swelling skull, and the other attacking him in the same place here his grandfather had just recently kicked him.

Groaning, he wrapped his bleeding arms protectively around the throbbing spot in his ribs, sinking slowly to the ground. He was breathing hard now, a faint whistling making itself present every time he inhaled, and he could feel the vibrations of the elders footsteps through the wooden floor on which he sat upon.

"Why do you think you're treated this way, grandson? Hmm? Do you think it's fair?"

He looked up, exhaling raggedly, almost afraid to set his view on his guardian's calm face. He was talking too softly, and it scared him something awful. _What are you up to?_ he wondered.

"Answer me, boy."

Kai's eyes thinned to mere slits, "What kind of question is that?!" he spat angrily, "Why would I have any idea of why you're so insane?"

It was his grandfather's turn to narrow his own eyes, but he closed them smoothly, giving a short chuckle, which sent shivers down grandson's spine. "Now, now, Kai. Is that any way to talk to your elders?"

"And is this any way to treat the child of your own son?" he snapped back, immediately recognizing the mistake once the words left his mouth.

The eyes of his grandfathers darkened suddenly, and the colour became sharper, as did the edges of his tiny pupils. "How many times have I said," he turned around so that his back was facing him, no doubt looking for something to use on him as punishment, "That you will never mention _him_ in this house **EVER AGAIN?!**"

This time, Kai didn't wait around to find out how much damage could be caused by this new, dangerous spark of anger. Doing his best to completely ignore the sharp, jabbing pains of the china being forced deeper into his skin, he stood up and turned the door knob, bolting outside and into the corridor, stumbling a few times before gaining his balance.

From behind him, he could hear his grandfather yelling, and could feel him thundering after him. His mind was now completely wiped of any logic, and clouded by a distinct fear he could barely remember from his past.

_Grandfather, did you know when someone's scared, their stomach curls up, making more room for their lungs to expand?_ Kai turned sharply, barely dodging a startled maid who had just walked out of one of the many rooms in the mansion she had been cleaning. _That's why I could always run so fast. You scare me so much..._

He eyed the giant staircase that led downwards into the main hall, and towards the huge doors that once opened, would grant him access to the outside. _Have you ever been this afraid, grandfather? Have you ever felt like this? Have you ever been so scared that you'll keep running until you're miles and miles away?_

_Do you feel like you'll die because of this? This fear? Does it wring your neck as tightly as you have mine?_ Kai paused for a second at the top of the stairway, and he heard a loud crash of things breaking behind him. _I can't breathe, grandfather. I can't breathe..._

Just as he had lifted his foot to lower it to the first step, something with a huge, flat surface hit him with such a force that it bawled him over, and he was sent head-over-heels down the stairs, tumbling painfully to land on the cold, reflective tiles of the grand hallway.

The table that had caused him to fall had rolled down after him - beside him, actually, as he had made contact with it more than a few times on the way down - and he lay on one of its finely carved legs, and a broken chunk of it created a second roof over his head. It was amazing that an old man like his guardian could lift one by himself, let alone throw it with such strength to get it as far as he had.

Shifting under the weight of the wood, he pulled himself out, watching in amazement as drops of blood appeared like magic on the shiny floor as he made his way towards the exit. _Are you ever surprised at how much blood there are in people? Have you ever seen how much one person can give out before they're gone?_ He strained to pull himself to his feet. _Have you ever tried to see it?_

The familiar sound of whistling air, accompanied by the clinking of breaking glass made itself apparent closely behind him. He turned around, lifting his eyes towards the upstairs where his grandfather stood, holding another vase in one hand.

"Don't make me come down there, boy," he yelled, and when Kai hesitated, he began to storm down the stairs, and the same icy feeling took hold of his grandson's insides.

_Please don't make me go_, he pleaded inwardly, _I'll do better; I'm sorry that I didn't do what you asked, I'm sorry that I can't change myself, I'm sorry that I can't be stronger, I'm so sorry..._

Then he shook his head mentally, a faint anger building on the inside. _No! Why should I be sorry? It's your fault! I didn't ask for this! It's your fault that all this has happened, not mine!_

He locked his eyes on the body of his grandfather charging towards him. _But then... but then you didn't ask for this either... did you?_

The vase shattered just inches from the side of his head, knocking him out of his funk, and he suddenly remembered his fear once again. As quickly as he could, he opened the massive door, almost tripping over the corner of it as he desperately made his way outside, jumping off the front porch and onto the walkway.

"Don't think you'll be able to live out there alone, Kai!" his grandfathers voice called at him, "You'll have to come back some day! And I'll be waiting for you, boy!" his deranged laugh echoed loudly through the air, "I'll be waiting!"

But Kai wasn't listening, for he ran. He ran, and ran, and ran for the fear of himself, of his grandfather, and knew he wouldn't stop until he was miles and miles away, because that's what it's like when you're afraid: you don't think ahead.

---------

_Phoenix__ Fallen:_ Well, that's the end of chapter one. Hope you like it! Please review, but remember courtesy, okay? Just be nice, and I'll be happy, and there will be more to come.

Ja ne!


	2. To Have Nowhere To Go

_Phoenix__ Fallen_: It's me again; thanks for all your wonderful reviews! I'll be responding to some of your comments individually at the end of this chapter – I've seen people do this before, and it's fun to get mentioned.

I think I'll be updating this fanfic once a week; I do have a life (amazing, ne?), and it's just fun to make you wait. I mean, I _have_ to make you wait, don't I? It keeps your interest in me, and the story. =P This chapter is shorter than the last – the length on the pages is around the same, but since the paragraphs are shorter, so is this part. This would have been posted sooner, but I got sick, and when I did, I edited, and added a bit in, so I guess that was a good thing, ne?

Okay, minna, I think I'm done shooting my mouth off. Now enough with boring old me, and let's get on with the next chapter…

---------

_Disclaimer:_ I, like many other people, do not own Beyblade; it belongs to Aoki-san. I do, however, own this plot.

---------

**For Those Who Are Beaten**

**Chapter Two: To Have Nowhere To Go**

---------

It was raining. Cold, thick particles of water fell down from the skies and splattered in tiny pieces on the solids they hit on the way towards the ground. From these pieces, puddles and miniature streams formed, and they flowed through the soggy earth, finding their way to big water, and then finally, towards the ocean.

Kai lifted his weary head, looking up and ahead of him as he walked. He was on a deserted road, one that hardly anybody used. That meant if he was to die, it would take a while for someone to find his body, if they ever did. He would probably be picked apart by scavengers first; fought over by the animals, then eaten one section at a time by all.

He shivered, partly because of the thought, and partly because he was freezing to death. It had been raining for quite some time now, and it didn't look like it would let up soon. He was completely soaked; his hair lay limp on his head, his damp pants rubbed at his legs, irritating his skin, and his shirt stuck like glue to his chest. But at least all the blood had washed off of him...

He wiped his eyes with his forearm, although that didn't do any good. Stopping for a second, he opened his mouth to the heavens, catching as many water droplets as he could and swallowing them, letting them run down his parched throat. He was so tired, and cold, and very, very thirsty. He hurt all over his body; his back, his head, his arms, his legs (he was limping on the one his grandfather had pulled on)... and in his side.

The throbbing in his right side had not let up. There felt like there was a giant bruise on the outside, but it was the inside that caused him such pain. He could hardly move without being accompanied by a piercing stab of affliction, and for some reason, he wasn't able to breathe without struggling.

His ears twitched suddenly: the sound of an engine tickled the sensitive hairs lining the skin inside as it purred along behind him, growing louder and louder as it came closer. A gust of wind was sent over him as it passed, causing him shiver again, and he rubbed his damp arms in a futile effort to warm himself up.

Kai sighed, hanging his head, nearly collapsing as he stepped once more on his sore leg displaced in its own hip socket. He would catch something being wet and frozen like this. He could feel sickness already beginning to creep into his marred, ulcerated body.

He shivered again, longer and more violently this time. _Curse you, Hiwatari_, he growled at himself, bending over and frantically rubbing at his arms again, _you can't even stand a little hike outside in the cold. You lived in Russia for years on end; what would Boris say if he saw you now?_

He stopped at the thought, letting himself drop to his knees. Boris Balkov was his caretaker, the one who raised him in the dingy abbey in Moscow. The one whose face haunted his dreams, but not more than that of his grandfathers. He hated Boris to the core, but it was his grandfather who he _really_ was afraid of. It was his grandfather's expectations that willed him to keep moving.

The sound of the car which had passed earlier reached his ears, and he druggedly looked up. He was dizzy, so incredibly dizzy, and there was a rancid, burning taste lingering in the back of his mouth. His body trembled, and he groaned, closing his eyes (he couldn't see properly anyway), following the auto by its sound as it stopped beside him, and he heard someone clamber out.

"Hey, kid, are you okay?" the voice belonged to a male like himself, although his vocals were soft and gentle, unlike his own harsh ones. Whoever it was, he had kneeled down beside him, and he could feel the warmth of his body wafting over to him.

Kai drew in a sharp breath, nodding his head weakly. _I'm fine_, he tried convincing himself, _I'm just a little woozy. It'll pass. Everything passes... and I will too..._

"Are you sure? You're completely soaked."

He could have laughed at that moment, and he nearly did, too. _Of course I'm completely soaked, you moron! I've been out in the rain for hours now! You stupid fool, how dare you sympathize with me!_

The young twenty year-old continued when he didn't respond, "What are you doing out here alone? Do you need a lift somewhere?"

He shook his head, forcing himself to stand, and nearly fell back down again if it weren't for the other boy catching him. He pushed away almost immediately, taking a few steps backwards. _You're hands_, he whimpered inwardly,_ they're burning me..._

"Lordy!" he exclaimed, "You're frozen! You're going to die of hypothermia before whomever you're running from catches you!" he reached forwards, grasping Kai by his wrist, and the boy cried out, wiggling out of the hold.

"Don't touch me," he gasped. In the place that had been grabbed, he could feel each individual piece of glass stinging his tissues, and tiny streams of blood began to run outwards. _How did you know_, he wondered, _how did you know I was running...?_

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to hurt you," the man murmured, "But you've got to come with me. You know, running from your problems isn't going to solve anything."

"I'm not," he growled, "He told me to, it wasn't my decision, don't patronize with me, I - "

"Woah, little man, calm down." he raised his hands, peering down on him, "I don't know what this is about, and it seems like you don't want to talk about it so..." he trailed off, and lowered his open palms to his sides.

Kai's shivering was growing persistent, and he tried his best to stop the violent shakings of his body, but was failing miserably. To make things worse, the whistling in his breathing was getting louder and louder... and he felt so awful. He dropped onto the ground, wrapping his arms loosely around his aching ribs.

"Look at yourself," the young man whispered, "You're a complete wreck." he knelt down so that he was eye-level with him, "What on earth happened to you?"

"N-nothing," his teeth were chattering by now, "Nothing h-happened to m-me."

"Of course something happened to you, you can't just get this way without anything happening." he paused, "Why are you running away?"

"I'm **not running**," he emphasized the words with his annoyance and frustration, "Nothing happened to me; it's not important."

The man sighed, "If you won't tell me that, at least tell me your name, won't you?"

He looked at him warily, studying his face, "H-Hiwatari," he answered in a raspy voice, "My name is Kai Hiwatari."

"Hiwatari, huh?" he echoed, "Aren't you - "

"No," he snapped, "I'm not anyone. I'm nobody. Just... just," he turned his head away, closing his eyes, "Just leave me alone," he muttered softly, "Just leave me alone..."

"C'mon, kid," he felt the heat of his body coming close to him again, "I can't just leave you here on the side of the road. What kind of person would I be then? Just let me take you back to your home, or where ever."

"You can't," he barely whispered, "I have nowhere to go." he raised his head to gaze upon him, and he could feel the rebellious tears welling up in his eyes, "I don't have anyone to go to..."

He blinked, and the droplets of salty liquid poured down his cheeks. At that exact moment, he was suddenly glad it was raining, for it hid the fact he had been caught at his weakest point. He took a deep breath, shuddering, and closed his eyes again.

_Grandfather, I've run away from you so many times, but that was of my own free will; I knew I could always come back. But you... you were the one who sent me away from you this time. How will I know if I'm ever welcome again?_

_Even though I've never said it to your face, grandfather, I can't get rid of this emotion I feel towards you. Not just the fear, but something else. Not anger, or confusion, or the hate, as most people would think, including yourself. But love; I love you._

_And how could I not? Aren't we family? Don't we share this blood that courses through our veins? Aren't we the last of our kind? The last of the grand race called Hiwatari? And what have you done to me? Broken me, crushed me, and have forced me out of your home. **Our** home. And still I love you. But now I don't know what I'm going to do... I'm completely lost.._

"Hey, it's alright," he felt a hand being placed gently on his shoulder, "You could come with me. I have room in my apartment. You could stay there until you've gathered yourself. It's no big deal."

"N-no, I c-couldn't..."

"Sure you could," he smiled faintly, "Or I could take you to your teammate's house. He'd know you better than I. What was his name? That Kinomiya boy."

Kai's mind gave a sudden jolt, and his eyes widened as the man pulled him to his feet, forcing him to stand. A sudden head rush from getting up too quickly hit him mercilessly, and he coughed dryly, his stomach and throat muscles contracting, but sending up nothing. He was being pulled towards the car, and he dug his wet sneakers into the mud, resisting it.

"No," he moaned, trying to push away at the hand that held his upper arm, "No, stop, you can't..."

"I can, and I have to," he glanced over to him, "You need a place to stay and... are you feeling okay?"

Kai could feel his face paling as a wave of nausea washed over him, and the world became swirling splotches of combinations of cyan, yellow, and magenta in his view. He was sweating, and heat rose up steadily along his neck and cheeks. He pivoted suddenly, getting down on his knees, breathing heavily.

The voice of the young man was vibrating through his ear, but he couldn't understand a single word of it. At that moment, he began to painfully spill his guts onto the soggy ground before him, then broke down onto his side, quivering in shock.

Whatever he had heaved up was burning in his mouth and in his throat, eating away at the sides of his tissues like acid, and someone's hammer was pounding a tattoo on, and in, the back of his head. Suddenly, his ears became unplugged, and everything became twice as loud, adding to the blows on his mind, and he found that everything was becoming black.

_The void, the darkness... at least something has come to take hold of me; but can you take it all away? Can you make me forget? Make me forget about how I had tried..._

Fog began to eat away at the sides of his vision, the worried face of the man looking down on him slowly fading into nothing,and Kai exhaled greatly, relaxing for the first time in a long, long time.

_Just take it all away..._

---------

_Phoenix__ Fallen:_ End of chapter two. I really hope you like it; I'm worried that my writing's becoming a bit… well, sloppy. And as promised, I'm going to respond to you, my gorgeous reviewers!

**Dragon:** You know what it's like to be beaten? I hope you told someone about your ex; he might end up hurting someone else the same way he hurt you. Abuse _(both physical and emotional)_ is no laughing matter, and should be reported to authorities who can take care of the issue, and give out the proper punishments. Wow, I sound like someone's mother or something. Oo At the moment, I'm just glad you're okay!

**Kai's Honey:** Not much to say here, Rosetta. I talk to you all the time anyway…

**Immortal Sadness:** Letting the reader see how terror-stricken Kai is of his grandfather was what was intended; it's good to know someone caught that, but it was kind of obvious - I think. And what did I inspire you to draw, exactly? Oh, I'd like to see that picture of yours.

**Eyriess:** I'll try not to let the angst go downhill; I don't know if I can, or if the story-line will still flow with a lot of it, but I'll try my best. Hopefully I'll get better in my writing as time goes on. Remember, I'm still new at this…

**Mrs. Hiwatari:** Don't you worry; I'll keep Kai's boxers. =D I wouldn't give them away for the world!

Arigatou gozaimasu, mina-chan, you know just how to boost my confidence. Thank you Hutchy, Snowflake-sisters, Kai/Hilary ROCK!!! _(because they do)_, Chibi-Kari, Penguin Pop, Dazogg, Dillon-kun, and anybody I missed, or whose read this, but hasn't submitted a review. You guys deserve something _(cookies!)_ for being so wonderful. And next time I won't leave such long comments… it kind of ruins the effect of the story. Gomen nasai. U

Ja ne, minna!


	3. To Awake in Familiarity

_Phoenix__ Fallen:_ Hey minna; I'm back! And domo arigatou; I love getting reviews. They get me pretty genki, and then I'm like that for the rest of the day. [_grins widely_]

Answering your questions; yes, the BladeBreakers will be in this story, and Hilary makes a small appearance next chapter. There **will** be more of her though, so don't worry! It's just taking a bit of time. And the guy that found Kai, well… [_coughreadthischaptercough_]

---------

_Disclaimer:_ I hail the ground Aoki-san walks upon; I don't own BeyBlade, he does, I only wish I did. Kami, why can't I? [_sighs_]

---------

**For Those Who Are Beaten**

****

****

**Chapter Three: To Awake in Familiarity**

---------

"... and I thought I'd bring him here because..."

Kai stirred, opening his crimson-brown eyes, and shutting them down tightly once the light of the day near well blinded him. Blinking rapidly as his pupils adjusted, he looked around him in confusion. It seemed that he was sitting in the passenger seat of a car, but whose was it?

Then he remembered. _That man must have put me here when I passed out_, he told himself, _but then,_ _where is he now? How am I going to get out of this mess?_

Shifting a bit in his chair - which had been adjusted so that he was almost lying down horizontally - he found that he was nestled quite comfortably under a few layers of thick, woolen blankets that had helped his body retain a healthy temperature, although he was still in his damp clothes.

"He's not looking so good; he was ice cold and had thrown-up just before he lost consciousness, and he's been bleeding all over my seats."

The same soft, gentle vocals of the man floated to him from somewhere on the outside of the auto, for they were slightly muffled and distant. He strained his ears, trying to catch his words that he spoke. Who was he talking to?

"If it's not too much of a hassle for you, I thought that I'd leave him here. I'm a complete stranger to him, and I know hardly anything about him. I mean, I _can_ take him if it's too much trouble - "

"No trouble at all my homie! It's cool if the man camps here! The little dudes will be glad to be seeing him again!"

Kai's eyes snapped open, and his heart skipped a beat before speeding up a notch in his chest. _That was the voice of Tyson's grandfather; that means he took me here to their house!_ He swore under his breath, sitting up and peering tentatively out the window.

He recognized the place almost immediately, although much to his dismay. It was the street just outside the boundaries of the Kinomiya dojo, and it seemed that the two adults were talking on the inside. He glanced down the road, and seeing as it was deserted, began to shuffle towards the door.

_If I make a run for it_, he thought as he valiantly forced his body to move, _I'll be able to get away from here. When they realize I'm gone, I'll be far, far away, and they'll never be able to find me again._ He rolled onto his side, his body pressed uncomfortably against the car entrance, as he was practically lying on top of it.

_That is... if I **can** make a run for it_.

Stretching out his arm below his torso, he touched the handle, and with a quick tug, the door opened, and he dropped painfully onto the asphalt, an afflicted gasp escaping his lips upon contact. Grunting, he pulled his arms out from under him and stood up, but as soon as he did, dizziness forced him back down.

Leaning his head against the side of the auto, he cursed himself again. _Damn it to hell, Hiwatari! Why won't you stand?! Have you become weak during all that time you've spent with those "BladeBreakers?" How could you have let that happen, after all the years of training you've done? How could you have allowed it?_

He frowned, using the car as support as he tried once more to lift himself to his feet, and this time, triumphed. But although he had accomplished this, his legs were shaking noticeably, and when he lifted his hands from the metal of the vehicle, he found the same, familiar, crimson liquid dripping down it.

Ignoring the jabs in his palms, and wiping the sight of his blood from his mind, he turned. _Now_, he wondered, _which was the fastest way out of here?_ A thought line crinkled his brow as he searched his recent memories. _I should avoid the beach and the lookout; Tyson and the others spend a lot of time there..._

He took a few, wavering steps forwards, and grabbed hold of a nearby street lamp to steady himself when he found he still couldn't find a way to balance. Was it his body with the problem, or was it all in his head? Testily, he let go of the cold, smooth pole, beginning to start walking as best as he could manage.

"So, dawg, did he give you a clue about how he got so banged up?"

There was a short pause.

"No, he wasn't too keen on the subject. But when I told him running away wasn't going to solve any of his problems, he said that it wasn't his decision. Someone - a _"he"_ - told him to go."

_Great_, Kai groaned inwardly, watching his feet carefully as they raised and fell slowly and repeatedly, _now they're going to use what I've said against me. They're going to try and get inside my head to figure out what happened. I'll have to watch everything I do or say from now on..._

Suddenly, his right leg collapsed underneath him, giving way to the pain inside his hip socket. Despite all his attempts not to, he gave a loud yell when gravity pulled him down onto the sidewalk, and his body slammed against it. It felt like he was landing on millions of tiny needles...

The vibrations and the sounds of Tyson's grandpa and the man who had brought him there found their way towards him, and he rolled over, just in time to see them bounding towards him. Their expressions were that of worry... and surprise.

"Lordy, kid! How in the world did you manage to get up?"

Kai rested his gaze on his face; he could actually see him clearly now. He was quite handsome: he had rich, dark, brown eyes, neat, jet-black hair, and slightly tanned skin. Had he met him before? Why was he so familiar?

The man knelt down beside him, looking - no, staring - at him intently, and the young teen found himself averting his view. It was nerve wracking having him gape like that, as if he was trying to see right through him. But that wasn't what made him uncomfortable, having him try to see past his facade. _Many_ people had tried to before, and all of them had failed. But him... it was like he _could_ look into him and find out _everything_...

Suddenly becoming aware of his shuddering body, Kai shifted on his back, wondering faintly why there were warm streams of red staining his shirt and pants, and why he was sounding more and more like a dying bird whenever he dryly tried to suck in more oxygen.

"Dawg, yo! You told me he got worn down pretty badly, but I never thought he'd be like _this_!"

Tyson's grandpa was standing at his feet, and bending over slightly, a kendo stick in hand. For once, his face was without merriment, and there was no hint of laughter crouching at the corners of his lips. He was completely serious; he was _never_ serious... ever.

"C'mon kid," the young man slipped his arms gently under his neck and knees, lifting him upwards and close to his chest, "We've got to get you inside."

A spark was issued from Kai's brain, and it jarred unpleasantly down his spine. "No!" he leant to one side so that he was teetering dangerously off the edge of the man's arms, "No, you can't! I don't want to go there! Put me down! Put me down! I don't want to! Let me go!"

He began to struggle, and the man's hold on him tightened. He kicked, and threw his body around wildly as a haze of anxiety clouded his mind, crying out sentences that he wasn't sure even made sense, but he yelled them out anyway.

"Calm down, kid!" the young adult proclaimed, "It's okay, it's just a house, there's nothing wrong with it!"

"No, you can't take me in there! He'll never let me go back if you do!"

"Who? Who won't let you go back?"

"_He_ won't! He'll be so angry with me, and then," his voice was becoming higher as he grew in hysterics, and he began to cough, straining for breath, "Then I'll never be able to see him again! He won't let me go back to him if you bring me there! He won't let me return..."

Kai finally fell limp; it was useless to try and fight. That man was just too strong for him, and it had gotten him so tired already, this trying to get away. What was the point? They could overpower him easily... he just didn't have anymore energy left inside of him. No matter what he tried to do, they'd still get him inside there.

"He won't take me back," he muttered sluggishly, "He'll never take me back. And it was my fault this time..."

_Grandfather, believe me when I say, that I don't want to go in there. I know you'll never forgive me if you ever find out that I've found shelter at my teammate's house. The only reason I joined that team in the first place was to capture their Sacred Spirits for you. Remember how much you wanted them?_

_You're practically the only reason for everything I do. I told myself I'd steal the Sacred Spirits because it would make you proud of me, and it would make you happy. Ever since Grandma died, you've been so sad, and that's why I promised that I'd do anything for you; I wanted so badly to see you happy again. And that's why I let you send me to the abbey..._

"Hey," the man bounced him mildly, "Kid? Are you still here?"

He blinked, "Wha... what?"

"You zoned out on me for a moment there," he smiled as the young teen's head drooped and inclined on his chest, "Did you hear what I said?"

Kai closed his eyes halfway. He was completely exhausted; jaded; weary._ Why must you be so kind to me?_ he wondered. _Why do you remind me of someone I hardly knew? Why do you allow me to access these faint memories of a woman cuddling me when I was just a baby; the warm embrace of her arms around me, just as you have me now? How is it that you do this...?_

"Kid?"

"I didn't..." he slurred almost immediately, "I didn't hear... what you said..."

There was short chuckle as his eyelids dropped entirely, "Nevermind, then. You need to rest."

Kai sighed, relaxing his tense, wounded muscles, "Fine," he whispered just before he drifted off, "I'll go if I really have to... I'll go if you tell me to... I'll go..."

---------

_Phoenix__ Fallen:_ There's the week's wait of chapter three. As before, I **really** hope you enjoyed it! Oh, and I promised to keep this short last time… so I will. Besides, I'm running out of things to say (woah, that's a first).

Arigatou gozaimasu, mina-chan! Chibi-Kari, you taught me a new word (muah, PRODiGiOUS!). Gomen, Libe! I didn't mean to make you cry (although that's a good thing… I think). Ellen, I was online when you reviewed – it was funny to see my MSN alerts pop up one after the other. Lastly, mystic-water – I can't wait 'till you update either. ;)

And now, a final warning: next week's chapter might be a bit late. I'm having a bit of trouble with it… I don't know why it doesn't like me! =P I'll try hard to make it on time, though.

L8er days… and don't forget to review!

Please?


	4. To See Another's Perspective

_Phoenix__ Fallen_: This chapter is probably going to seem, well, off to you. At least, it seems off to me, and I do not really like it that much. But I don't know what else to do with it! Maybe I'll fix it later…

Anyway, I'll ramble again at the end of this chapter. Just read on, and don't get mad at me because it's not that good! [_ducks under desk_] Oh, and stop your poking! You'll find out who that man is soon enough! Just wait, a'ight? It'll be explained… in an upcoming chapter.

---------

_Disclaimer:_ Beyblade belongs to Aoki-san, while I only own this plot. Actually, I don't see anything saying that I do, except for my word… but, um… I dunno.

---------

**For Those Who Are Beaten**

****

****

**Chapter Four: To See Another's Perspective**

---------

_Tap, tap, tap, tap, tap-itty, tap, tap._

Frowning slightly in his sleep, Kai's brow twitched each time the sound of something clicking reached his ears, vibrating through his skull, causing him to realize the trifle headache settled there. He groaned, moving his head so that it would lie on its side, and the noise stopped for a moment, then continued on endlessly.

_Tap, tap, tap-itty, tap._

Annoyance growing each time the clickings resounded in his head, he opened his red-brown eyes, glaring up at the wooden ceiling of the Kinomiya dojo. This, too, he recognized; he had spent a few months in the very same room when the "BladeBreakers" were still together, and facing challenges like those from the _Saint Shields_ and _Team Psykick_. They had all slept here every night.

He was lying quite contentedly on a soft, thin mattress placed on the ground - a traditional futon - and clean, white bed sheets were spread over him. Slowly, he sat up, suddenly noticing that he wasn't in his own clothes: he was wearing what looked like a pair of Tyson's grey pants, white, cotton socks, but was lacking a shirt.

Looking down on his bare chest, he gave a short, intake of breath. _No wonder I hurt so much_, he thought as he ran his fingers delicately along his side, and down towards his finely built abdomen. There, he found numerous dark purple bruises, accompanied by many cuts and scratches, and an open gash running straight across him, which was most probably caused by the severed table.

He sighed quietly, glancing over to his side, and over to the exit, where he found the source of the unceasing clicking just a few feet away from him. He cocked his head to one side slowly - just wolves did when interested - and found a wave of curiosity getting the better of him.

"What are you working on?" he asked aloud, his raspy voice sounding much louder than he had wished it to.

Kenny gave a short, surprised shout, jumping a few feet up in the air. Clutching the left side of his chest, where his heart was undoubtedly pounding, he turned from the screen of his laptop, looking over, completely amazed.

"K-kai!" he exclaimed, "You're... you're..."

Kai blinked, still staring at the computer, and he repeated his question, unfazed by the others stuttering, "What's that?" he nodded at it once, "What are you working on?"

"Oh..." Kenny glanced back over to the screen for a second, "I was just... just updating Dranzer's status."

At the mention of his Sacred Spirit, Kai's hand flew instinctively to his pocket, although he already knew his blade wasn't going to be there. A shimmer of anger began to bubble inside him, surfacing as he glared over at the brunette.

"You... took..." in his growing rage, he wasn't able to finish his sentence, and his hand curled into a tight fist in the sheets around him, which were soon becoming stained from the red liquid escaping around the glass shards.

_You touched Dranzer...? Without my permission? How could you take the one creature that has stayed by my side this entire time? How could you even dare to think of taking him from me? You... I'll -_

"I'm really sorry I didn't ask first," Kenny bowed his head, reaching for something behind his laptop and holding it out, "I've been working on it since yesterday, when you arrived. We found it in your pant pocket, and I've had it since then; I've improved everything on it that I could. I hope you aren't mad..."

Kai's eyes had softened the moment he saw what lay in Kenny's hands: his blade... it looked almost brand-new. He reached out, taking the small object in his palm, rubbing the cool metal lightly (his skin was very sensitive because of the china) examining it. It was shining; the navy blues, deep greens, and bright reds sparkling in the sunlight.

His eyes trailed to the center of it, where the bit - the home of the beast - was located. A faint, yet distinguishable warmth began to radiate off of it, as his brilliant, loyal phoenix immediately sensed the emotions raging inside of him, and began to soothe him silently, relaxing him, and calming his nerves.

He looked upwards towards Kenny, his heart feeling much lighter, "Thank you," he murmured, "But... why? Why would you do this for me?"

Chief blushed a light shade of pink, "It's... a present. From me to you."

"What for?"

He shrugged, "I... figured you could use an upgrade."

A twinge of annoyance, and flash of fury, "What's that supposed to mean?" he asked roughly.

"Nothing!" the computer expert quickly reasoned, "You're strong, Kai, I'm not saying you're not. It's just..."

"Just what?" he snapped, narrowing his eyes, "What are you trying to say, then?"

_You're trying to say I'm not good enough, is that what?_ he snarled inwardly, _I don't need anyone else telling me that! Boris... Grandfather... those two are enough to deal with. Grandfather's criticism alone is enough to deal with... because I know he's right. He's always right. Which is why I've got to find a way to get back to him._

Kenny was looking very flustered, opening his mouth a few times and closing it, but no sound came out. Patience wearing thin, Kai decided to ignore him and his comments, leaning forwards, slowly bringing is feet under him, and straightening his legs until he was standing.

Chief scrambled to his side, "What're you doing?" he put his hand on his shoulder, managing to push him back down into his bed (much to both boy's surprise).

"I'm getting out; I'm going. There's nothing for me here," he retorted, growling as he pushed away his hand, "What do you care, anyway?"

"I care a whole lot, Kai!" the shorter, younger one fell silent for a moment, and then added, "That's why I improved Dranzer for you. I'm always upgraded the others equipment, but never yours, and I've only just realized it fully now."

Kai blinked, his anger evaporating, and Kenny continued, his eyes fastened to the wooden floor.

"I know you never liked me, and I was never too fond of you either. You were always cold, mean, you never showed any respect for me, and it wasn't the greatest feeling in the world; feeling like you were always looking down on me. So I just learned to leave you alone, and I guess that's why I never worked with you."

Something in the teen's mind shifted, and he could hear faint voices from his own past. He could hear that member from the _Dark Bladers_ challenging him, for they had Chief as their hostage. _Fine with me_, his younger, smirking voice echoed quietly, _enjoy your home cooked Kenny-burgers._

Back in reality, Chief kept talking, "This year, it's been different. You actually acted like... like I really was part of this team. You were the one who had volunteered - without anyone asking, even - to accompany Hilary and I to the lighthouse on that mad doctor's island, because you said we needed protection. Remember?"

Nodding slowly, Kai gazed down at the fidgeting boy beside him. He was... he was just like him, but in a lighter situation. He could relate to how he felt... and it hurt to know that _he_ did that to him.

"Yeah," he muttered softly, "Yeah, I remember... falling rocks..."

"Yes," Chief raised his eyes from the floor, "And the falling rocks. You saved us - Hilary and I - from getting crushed in that landslide. You risked your life to push us into the side of the cliff, and you stood over us to make sure we didn't get hurt..." he let his sentence fade off, and it was silent for a while.

"I never knew I made you feel that way," Kai whispered, shaking his head lightly, "I never meant to cause it..."

_Are you there, Grandfather? Did you catch all of that; that conversation? The boy, Kenny... I made him feel worthless... and I never knew... but still he cared about me; still he was kind to me. Doesn't that remind you of something? Of a relationship in your life? Because our lives together, the way we treat each other, are just like that, except... worse. Extremely worse._

_Do you know that you're hurting me? Or do you, like I had to Kenny, not know what damage you are creating? You can't imagine how much time I spend thinking about this; you have no idea how many nights were spent dreaming of it all - how many nights have been haunted by these nightmares of reality._

_Or **do** you know? Are you haunted by what has happened as well? Do you remember when you, Grandma, and I were living happily together, back when you didn't even know how to frown? Do you still dream of when it all fell apart, when it all broke down, when all of our joy ended? It didn't have to end... but you - we, both - made it that way. I didn't want it... I just followed your lead... but it's as much my fault as it is yours..._

"It's okay, Kai." Chief voiced softly, reading the slight expression on the other's face as best he could.

"No," Kai frowned, hardly aware of what he was saying, "It's not okay; nothing's okay. Everything's gone wrong; it's always been wrong. Nothing's been right. Ever since they were all taken away, this has all been a mess. I can't do anything right..." he gave a low growl of his own disapproval as he watched drops of blood dropping down his clenched fist.

_Father, Mother, Grandma... why'd you have to go? Why'd you have to leave me here? I don't know what's going on... why can't you come back to me? How did you leave me in the first place...?_

_Grandfather, do you hurt like me? I'm sorry for bringing up the mention of my father; I know it caused you pain, and you're not used to it like I am. You become angry because of it, and then you take it out on me - beat me, throw me out of my own home. But I keep it all to myself; it eats away at me on the inside._

_Do you know that I hear you cry about it sometimes? At night, when I lie awake - afraid of what I'll dream of next - I'll hear your muffled sobs coming through the walls of the mansion. You miss them all... just as I do. You need someone's comfort... just as I do._

_I cry with you, did you know? I cry as much as you..._

Kai sighed, his heavy eyelids threatening to close down. Ignoring the sores, the throbs, the piercing stings, and the small, warm rivers of blood all over his body, he slumped back down into his futon, curling his legs up closer to his body for warmth, and wrapping the blankets up around his shoulders tightly.

"I can't keep this up much longer," he murmured quietly as his head sunk deeper into his pillow, and he lost himself to rest, "I'll die before I ever get anywhere..."

---------

A small figure made its way through the darkness, wandering confused through the thick, unending fog. His blue shark-fins painted upon his cheeks were the first things noticeable about him, adding to his already fierce exterior, but his deep, crimson-brown eyes darted around nervously.

_I've been here before..._

Kai stopped abruptly, staring in disbelief at what he saw ahead of him. His breathing became shallow, and his heartbeat sped up a few notches in the left side of his chest. With one arm, he reached out towards the outline slowly, and whispered, "Mother?"

The woman turned around, and her beautiful face was clear in his view. She smiled gently, her eyes sparkling from some unseen light source. Below her feet were poppies; blood red petals with the blackest of black for their centers, and dark green as their stems and leaves. They bent delicately around her, and dew drops rolled off them whenever they were tipped.

Suddenly, the smile of the woman faded, and her soft, joyful expression was replaced by a sorrow-filled one. Kai faltered, taking a hesitant step forwards in her direction, then began to run flat out when she started to disappear.

"Mother! Mother, don't go!" he cried as he sprinted, his one arm still outstretched, "I didn't even get to know you properly! Don't leave me; don't go!"

She smiled again - a sad, depressed one - and lifted her hand, dipping her fingers in a small wave.

"No!" he screamed desperately, and he let his tears fall freely down his cheeks, which flew by him as he ran, "Mother, please! Don't leave me here! I don't want to be alone anymore! Please, Mother, don't go!"

Just as his hand came up to touch her, her image vanished completely, leaving him with nothing but what looked like swirling, grey smoke instead. He collapsed, falling forwards to the ground, beginning to sob uncontrollably into his arms.

"No," he begged between pained gasps, shutting his eyes down tightly, "Don't go; I don't want you to go. Please don't leave me here by myself... I don't want to be alone anymore..."

Slowly, he became aware of a warm, gentle stroking motion running across his forehead, and then transferred down on his cheek. Stopping his whimpers, he opened his eyes, realizing that he wasn't in the darkness anymore; he wasn't in the poppy-filled place that reminded him of what he had lost...

He was still in Tyson's family dojo, although this time, it wasn't bright, as it had been day when he had spoken to Kenny. Now, the natural light came from the moon, accompanied by a few shimmering constellations, which shone through the windows of the wooden foundation.

Raising his view upwards, he rested his gaze upon _her_, the one Kenny had mentioned earlier in the day. As his pupils adjusted to make the best of the little light, he looked upon her deep ruby eyes, her soft brown hair curling neatly around her face, and her worried expression as she looked down on him while she sat beside his futon.

"Hi... hil...ary?"

"Shhh..." she whispered, continuing to soothe his hot, burning face with her cool hand, "You're not alone, Kai. I'm here... I won't leave. Don't worry, it was just a nightmare, everything's fine."

He closed his eyes in an extended blink before opening them again, hardly soaking in what she just said. His body felt like a ton of lead, and he was covered in a light film of sweat; he could feel an intense amount of heat rising from his body, and his thoughts were cloudy and unclear.

"Hilary?" he asked, watching her eyes shine as if she were about to cry, "What's... what's wrong? Is... is someone sick?" he swallowed dryly, feeling utterly confused. Somehow, the thought of someone ill kept echoing in his mind.

"Am... am I sick?"

She nodded, "Mmm hmm. You've got a fever, Kai. You stayed out in the cold and the rain too long. Now, just go back to sleep, alright?"

He frowned, "Rain? When...?

"You were out in the rain in the morning, remember? And that man had found you and picked you up off the side of the road and brought you here to Tyson's house. Now, please, Kai; go back to sleep."

"I don't need to sleep," he argued back at her, running his words together as he spoke, as he was unable to articulate them properly, "I don't want to."

It was Hilary's turn to frown, "You _need_ to sleep Kai - to get better. Now, _please_, close your eyes," she trailed her hand up to his brow, gently flipping her fingers across it before bringing her limb to rest on her lap.

"But I can't," he reasoned weakly in his dry, raspy voice, hardly knowing what he was blurting out, "It's only me there, in my dreams. I don't like it - I don't like being alone, especially there; I can't see anything."

"You're not alone, Kai," she repeated, "I'm right here, and I'm not going to leave you," slowly, she leant in towards him, "I _promise_ I won't leave you," then, in one smooth, fluid motion, she brought her face up to his, brushing her lips with his forehead, and whispered, "Just go to sleep."

Shifting back into her regular, sitting position, she continued in stroking his face, attempting in cooling him down, "When I was little," she told him softly, "My Mom used to sing to me whenever I couldn't sleep. She'd sing all sorts of different songs - songs from musicals, movies, or her favorites off the radio..."

Kai gave a nod, recognizing the look on her face - the change of expression once she let herself go back to her memories. Hilary began to hum, setting the tune whilst absent-mindedly beginning to play with the bangs of hair near his face. He relaxed slightly at this action, exhaling greatly, feeling a new wave of heat come wafting past his cheeks and neck.

"_I close my eyes,  
Only for a moment, then the moment's gone.  
All my dreams, pass before my eyes, a curiosity._

_Dust in the wind,  
All we are is dust in the wind_."

Her light, angelic voice floated through the night air, weaving a gentle melody that eased into his troubled mind, letting all his current worries disappear in the music. Suddenly, he felt like he was floating - floating upon a wispy cloud that traveled with the slightest push of the wind. 

"_It's the same old song,  
We're just a drop of water in an endless sea._

_All we do_

_Just crumbles to the ground, though we refuse to see._

_Dust in the wind,_

_All we are is dust in the wind_."

Now listening to the words of her song, he found himself slipping in and out of distinct dreams, passing before his eyes... or were they memories triggered only now? A drop of water in an endless sea - he was one, indifferent person in the world. His actions wouldn't account to anything... all he did just crumbled to the ground, and he refused to see it... he was hurt from the shame that nothing he did would impress his grandfather... 

"_Life's too short, brothers and sisters._

_Dust in the wind,_

_We are all dust in the wind_."

The majority of his family had left - been taken away from them, before he really even knew them. He saw how fragile and short lives were; really like dust in the wind, they had been guided by fate, and couldn't do anything to prevent it; the wind is just too strong for tiny particles of dust. 

"_Don't hang on,  
Nothing lasts forever but the earth and sky.  
It's always there  
And your money won't another minute buy.  
Dust... all we are is dust in the wind.  
Life's too short brothers and sisters.  
Dust... all we are is dust in the wind_."

Should he continue this; put up with all of this any longer? He hated it when Grandfather dwarfed him, but he only did it out of frustration... didn't he? Sure, Grandfather's exterior was hard, cold and mean, but on the inside, he pained and broke down. He and his Grandfather were the same in so many ways...

"_Open your eyes you've acquired a bit,  
Keep your balance, don't you slip.  
It could all end instantly as you see  
Time waits for no one, it just moves on.  
There is a white one  
Who won't accept the black one  
Who won't accept the yellow one  
Who can't accept the white_..."

Only two Hiwatari's were left in the world, and both had seen how quickly it can end - an ear-shattering bang, a short, afflicted scream, and then everything left silent. That's why there were only two Hiwatari's left... and soon, maybe only one.

Kai closed his eyes, Hilary's beautiful voice still drifting in his mind, her hand still caressing his cheek. Maybe... maybe he should just stop thinking about it now. Maybe he should just stop worrying and let himself rest properly. Maybe, just maybe, something would go right for him...

"_When will we learn,  
That all we are is dust in the wind.  
Time for the healing to begin,  
All we are is dust in the wind.  
Time for healing to begin,  
All we are is dust in the wind.  
Everything is dust in the wind_..."

---------

_Phoenix__ Fallen:_ There, that wasn't _so_ bad, was it? You could probably tell had trouble with this one, and I just kind of forced it out, but the next one will be better, I promise! Oh, and I don't think I'll be able to update every week anymore. It's hard, minna! I want some "_me time"_ too! I hope you can understand that.

The song – that was originally by Kansas and it's called, _"Dust in the Wind." _I love that song, it's so pretty. [_begins to sing_] Oh, and those spaces between the lyrics... I don't know why it does that. I tried **so many things**, but it just doesn't like me.

I don't think I'm missing anything… did I say all I needed to say? Hmm, I guess so. [_shrugs_]

Ja ne, mina-chan, and please leave me a review!


	5. To Remember His Youth

_Phoenix__ Fallen_: Kami, it's been a while, ne? [_snorts_] Yeah, only about two months… I think I got enough "me time" to last me a while, and since summer's now here… [_grins_] I think I got this chapter done well, I mean, it's not like how I felt about the last one.

Sorry minna: no explanation of **the man** in this chapter, and there's no Tyson, Max, Rei, etc. There's only Kai and Hilary, although you'd like that, huh?

Oh, and you've probably already noticed this, but I made the whole story look different. But I don't know why stars, underscores, and those arrows pointing upwards don't show here anymore… it's kind of annoying, really…

---------

_Disclaimer:_ (it makes me so sad to keep having to say this all the time) I do not own Beyblade – Aoki-san does. If I did own it… [_evil glint in eyes_]

---------

**For Those Who Are Beaten**

**Chapter Five: To Remember His Youth**

---------

Sunlight streamed through the windows, and slowly, Kai began to stir, opening his eyelids tentatively and peering through his long, delicate lashes. He shifted under the big, warm comforter - stained red for he hadn't been bandaged up yet - finding that now he was wearing one of Tyson's yellow t-shirts, before turning his head around the room, which was empty, apart from a few blankets sprawled messily on separate futons. And then there she was...

Immediately beside his thin mattress, he saw Hilary curled up tightly in the linen upon her own bed, her head snuggled into her pillow. He sat up, with a bit of difficulty, leaning over, studying her face curiously as she slept - he had never really interacted with females before. He grew up only with Tala, Bryan, Spencer and the other boys from the abbey he had been sent to. There were _never_ any girls there.

But here _was_ one: her eyes closed gently, her glossy, pink lips curled the slightest bit in a small smile as she dreamt herself away, her breathing even and unconcerned, and her breast rose and fell in a perfect, rhythmic pattern...

Unaware of himself, he began to incline closer towards her, his eyes darting this way and that, scanning her soft, smooth skin, taking in her floral, girlish scent while his breath commenced in making those rebellious wisps of hair of hers dance animatedly on her forehead. He advanced, getting closer and closer until they were almost touching.

It was only when, unexpectedly, she sighed, reaching up with her hand to help bury her face into the pillow some more, did Kai realize what he was doing - did he snap out of his funk - and he jerked backwards, settling back down into his futon.

_What was that, Hiwatari?_ He questioned himself as he glanced around once more, resting his gaze back on Hilary for a brief moment. _Why do your eyes be enticed towards her again?_

He frowned at himself, tearing his view away from her calm, sleeping form, forcing his attention onto the window, occupying himself with nothing but it. Beyond the perimeters of the house and the dojo, the wind was blowing a soft breeze, odd leaves flew by as they fell lightly from the branches of trees... and soon he found his mind becoming lost in a deep train of thought.

Somewhere outside, he could hear little birds chirruping happily, and every once in a while he could see their sleek, colourful bodies darting around in the sky as he gazed blankly through the glass. He couldn't help but allow himself a little smile; ever since his youth, he had loved birds - he had been absolutely fascinated by them.

Back when his Grandfather had still been a kind, loving man - before his wife, Kai's grandmother, had died - they used to set apart time every night, and he would retell to the young boy glorious stories and folktales that had been passed down from generations of Hiwatari's to him.

Kai remembered these times with a vague fondness, and often came back to contemplate upon them. His Grandfather would always settle himself in an enormous, leather armchair in the living room, while he would've either sat contentedly on his knee or on the carpeted floor (although when that happened, sooner or later, he'd find himself scrambling up to sit back in his guardian's lap).

Grandfather's stories were fascinating ones, filled with magical creatures such as witty, cunning elves, dainty, flower-sized faeries, or hairy, bristling beasts. Kai would sit up straight, and listen in rapt attention to each lore, blurting out question after question to his grandfather, and making him repeat certain things until he was sure he had heard correctly. Back then, his grandfather had patience for him, and would answer all his inquires knowingly, and with a great, unsurpassable wisdom.

But there was one story that the young Kai begged to be told to him again and again, one story that he truly was intrigued with, and it was that one story that held the pride and honor of the whole Hiwatari name - the tale of the magnificent Phoenix.

Now, there were many variations to the legend of the one called _"The King of the Birds,"_ and Kai heard each one threefold, memorizing certain aspects and important points about them. There was the Chinese Feng-huang with its multicoloured tail feathers, the Suzaku, the Japanese Ho-oo, Karuda, the Egyptian Benu associated with the god Osiris... and the list kept going. One thing was certain through all of these stories, however, and that was that the bird was glorious in every way, and royal as any king or queen.

There was also the tale of the Phoenix that was unique to only the Hiwatari's - for it was to them that the events occurred. Back in the medieval times, one of Kai's ancestors had been stranded on a small island after a pirate ship he was working with had been attacked. After a few minutes, the massive boat was sinking, and he had washed up on the shore hours later.

So there the Hiwatari wandered about, with absolutely no means of being saved. Then, one day, it began to storm, and giant forks of lightning came down upon the trees, breaking them and setting them on fire. The flames spread swiftly along the land, greedily and hungrily. They consumed all in their path, licking at the sides of bushes, and leaving nothing untouched. Oh, how great and terrible this fire was, but beautiful and magnificent at the same time.

Coughing terribly, Kai's ancestor had fallen in the middle of the inferno, ready to give into the heat when he saw something outlined against the reds and oranges - it was advancing towards him, crying out a melodious song. Flying a few feet from the ground, it came and sat before him, nudging him gently with its head, then lifting its wings to create a crown around his skull. It was then that he blacked out.

Kai remembered his reaction to when he first heard the story: "Grandfather!" he had cried, straightening suddenly and tugging frantically on his cloak, "What happened then? What was that thing? Was it a bird, Grandfather? What was it doing? How - "

"Hush, Kai," his Grandfather would tell him, just as he always did, stroking his head gently to calm him down, "Just let me continue, and you will find out."

And he _had_ found out: his forefather had waken up in a fisherman's house, who had said that he was found a little ways off the coast, lying in what seemed to be a nest made from bits of cinnamon and sweet smelling herbs. When the Hiwatari told his host about what he had seen, he received an odd look, and was given a single red feather, being told he was found holding it.

Over the years, that same man glimpsed the bird which had saved him on the island again and again, but only when he was in a seemingly hopeless and desperate situation. It was if he was drawn to trouble, and in turn, the bird was drawn to it through him as well, and so it earned its title: the firebird, Dranzer.

Trailing his hand under the blankets and over to his side, Kai picked up his blade from the floor, holding it up so that he could see it properly; so that he could see it shimmer delicately in the light; so that he could rest his eyes upon the mythological being he loved so dearly.

_Why are you still here, Dranzer?_ He asked it wonderingly. _I still don't know why you've kept your faith in me so much as to stay here by my side. Haven't I already made it clear that I am not strong enough? You've been taken from me twice already - I've lost you twice because I was just too weak to protect you. But somehow, you always come back... you've been drawn back to me._

_Is that what is, then? Am I hopelessly drawn to trouble, just as my ancestor had been? Is that why you're here? Is that the **only** reason you're here? Only because I can't find a way to help myself?_

Kai frowned at the thought, glaring ahead at the tiny bird situated in the bit almost angrily, his mind swimming with bitter, spiteful thoughts. _You're in this with Grandfather, aren't you? This is just another way for him to prove my weakness... hasn't he seen it enough? Hasn't he seen me fail too many times to count?_

His hand tightened around the metal top, but his grip faltered once he remembered the fragments of the broken vase, and his fury quickly evaporated into distress.

_Look at me... my pathetic self. I can't even hold you properly anymore..._

As if in response to his growing sorrow, the phoenix started to give off a reassuring heat that crept down his hand and into his arm, slowly beginning to spread across his entire body. He smiled faintly, placing the blade back onto the floor beside his futon, murmuring his thanks and his apologies.

_I don't know what I'd do without you, my Dranzer, my dear. I don't know what I'd do without you..._

---------

It had been a few minutes until Hilary finally began to stir beside him, shifting more often and rolling about in her blankets frequently before opening her ruby irises to the world. Yawning, she stretched herself out like a cat would, then relaxed suddenly, pushing herself into a sitting position, her brown hair creating a neat, fluffy mess around her head.

"Good morning," she half-whispered when she saw he was awake, smiling and turning her body to face him, "Did you sleep alright?"

He nodded slowly, and she reached forwards, placing her hand on his forehead, "Are you feeling better?"

Again, he nodded, but it seemed as if his response didn't really matter to her, as she continued in checking his temperature with her hands on his face, then placed them on the sides of his neck, beginning to rub her fingers into his skin and up, under his jaw bone.

Kai fought with all his worth not to squirm at her current action - what was she doing? It made him nervous beyond belief that she was getting so close to him, as he had unconsciously learnt to fear physical contact when he was young - Boris had made sure of that with all the punishments he had been through. But she didn't seem like she wanted to hurt him...

"Is your throat sore?"

He blinked, shaking himself mentally, "Y-yes," he found himself rasping, swallowing dryly, "A bit."

She bit her lip, withdrawing her hands from his skin, "I thought so," she began, "You're glands, in your neck, they're a bit swollen."

_So that was what she was doing_, he thought as he watched her stand up, straightening her pyjama top. They were white as cotton sheets hanging out to dry on a warm summers day, and printed on them were tiny, delicate flowers the colour of a deep, rich red that reminded him of...

"Are you hungry?" she asked, and his trail of thought snapped so suddenly that it took him a while to respond.

"No," he lied, although the last time he had eaten was the first night he had arrived at his house - and it was the next morning he was thrown out again. The dinner was potatoes with steak; soft, tender, juicy steak whose smell would fill the whole room with its delicious odor, and would make even his mouth begin to water hungrily.

But he was Kai Hiwatari, and he had not forgotten his training he had been through when was young; he did not let this feeling of his show, no matter how desperate he was for food.

She paused for a moment, faltering as she took a step towards the house, as if she knew all about his secret desire, but didn't want to reveal so, "Are you... are you sure?"

He nodded, and she frowned, the edges of her lips curving downwards a tiny bit, and he knew she didn't believe him. But, nonetheless, she pivoted on the back of her heel, exiting the dojo to enter the Kinomiya household, and not stopping once to look back at him.

He sighed, and it seemed like he didn't have enough time to close his eyes for even a minute, when she came bursting back into the room, holding a bowl full of something close to her. Balancing it as she walked, she stopped at the side of his futon and sat herself down, setting it on her lap.

Craning his neck over in curiosity, he peered through the wafting steam, squinting to see a mixture of egg, broth, and long, thin noodles - oh, did it ever smell inviting. He glanced upwards at Hilary who was gazing at him expectantly, then lay his head back down on the pillow, ignoring the temptation and shaping himself to look uninterested.

But the girl beside him tried again, "Aren't you hungry, Kai? Don't you want to eat, even just a little bit?"

With his eyelids shut, he shook his head silently.

"_Kai_," a hint of annoyance passed through her voice, and he could imagine her with her hands on her hips, pursing her lips the way she always did when irritated with Tyson.

He cast his irises lazily upon her, "No," he stated firmly, holding back a smile when he saw that she was doing the exact thing he thought she was, while the bowl of food sat beside her.

"Yes, you _do_ want to eat," she told him, leaning forwards and fixing him with a determined expression, "I know for a fact that you haven't eaten since yesterday morning; and maybe you didn't even eat then. Don't tell me that you're not hungry!"

"I'm _not_ hungry," he answered stubbornly, and he rolled over in his futon, turning onto his side, his back facing her, and he frowned considerably to the empty space infront of him.

That's when she reached over, forcing him back into his original position by pulling his shoulder towards her, "Yes, you _are_ hungry!" she practically shouted, "Don't lie to me!"

"I'm not," he narrowed his eyes, and if he had known as a child, he would have crossed his fingers.

"Then **eat**," she slithered her hand underneath his back, between his shoulder blades, gently pushing upwards and easing him into a sitting position. He blinked a few times in surprise, but said nothing, watching quietly as she picked up the steaming bowl of food on the floor beside her, twirling the noodles tightly around the chopsticks.

"Come on, Kai," she coaxed softly, "Eat the ramen."

His eyes darted back from her face to the thin noodles she held out for him. Should he ignore everything he had been taught all those years ago in the abbey and give in to this temptation? It would be easy, and it would satisfy his famished self... but that would also be like throwing away everything he knew...

Finally, he shook his head, but only once, and Hilary scowled unpleasantly.

"Eat the ramen, Kai," she persisted.

Again, he disagreed noiselessly.

"Kai," her frustration showed in her tone of voice and the knotting of her brow, "Eat the ramen."

He frowned at her, and she wrinkled her nose, glaring straight at him through narrowed eyelids.

"Eat the ramen!"

"No."

"Eat the ramen, Kai!"

"No!"

"Kai, **eat the ramen**!"

"No, I don't wa - "

The moment she saw a wide enough opening, Hilary forced the utensil past his lips, forcing the noodles into his mouth and giving him no choice but to swallow them. He coughed a few times, his entire body shaking as he did, and she sat back, looking a bit worried as he panted for breath, but was clearly pleased nonetheless.

"That wasn't so hard, was it?" she smiled sweetly, and he shot her an infuriated look with one glittering eye. Honestly, it had hurt his pride and had stirred up the throbbing in his side again. But she ignored his glare, picked up a piece of cooked egg, and held it out for him with her chopsticks, "Open your mouth," she instructed.

He gave a low growl of protest, and the brunette's chafed expression returned, "Kai, you're not going to get any better without eating, so eat your egg and ramen!"

"I didn't ask for it," he argued, trying to forget his sore throat, "And I'll be just fine without it!"

She scoffed, "Don't be so stupid!" she shook her head in utter disbelief, "I never thought there'd be someone as hot-headed and stubborn as Tyson, but you've just proved me wrong!"

"Don't you dare compare me to Tyson," he glowered furiously at her, feeling the blood in his veins beginning to boil, "And don't tell me what to do!"

"If I don't," she began to raise her voice to match his yelling, "Then you won't take care of yourself properly!"

"I've been taking care of myself just fine!" he snarled, feeling unusually rebellious, "I'm still breathing, aren't I? I don't need anyone to watch over me, especially not you!"

She looked hurt at his remark, and she lowering her eyes to the ground, averting her gaze away from him, "I was just trying to help," she murmured after what seemed to be an eternity of silence. Her voice was cracked and shaky, and he suddenly felt a vicious stab of guilt hit him in the left side of his chest. Why had he just done that?

"Hilary," he began, his frustration disappearing, as he hated to see anyone with a look such as that, "I..."

"No," she cut him off before he could start anything else, "No, I understand, Kai. You don't have to say anything."

"But - "

"Kai," she was getting to be nettled once more, "_I said_ you don't have to say anything!"

His fury began to bubble up again at her words, "Yes, I _do_ have to say something because you _don't_ understand, and you don't know what I'm going to say!"

"Well I know perfectly well what you're _trying_ to say!"

"No you don't, you're just - "

She let out an exasperated sigh, "Just _shut up_, Kai!"

Much to his irritation, he found himself settling and fuming quietly in his mind. Who did she think she was? And why was he suddenly acting like such a child; shouting and bickering like this? Oh, but she just was making him so mad... but then, was he _really_ upset with her?

He gave her a sideways glance, and at the same time, she did the exact action, and their eyes locked in the dead silence. It was awkward... but at the same time, it wasn't. She gave him a sense of assurance; sifting through all his doubt, she comforted him and warmed him just like...

_Just like Dranzer_...

The sound of the sliding door opening shattered through the quiet of the dojo abruptly, the connection that the two adolescents had had within that spilt second snapped, and Hilary started slightly in surprise.

"Hey, what's going on in here?" a bright-eyed Tyson asked while poking his head through the opening.

Kai's heart suddenly skipped a beat, and a jab of pain hit his lower ribs. Standing behind the Kinomiya boy were a few people he recognized, including Mr. Dickinson and that dark-haired man who had saved him...

---------

_Phoenix__ Fallen:_ You've just missed him! [_grins evilly_] You'll have to wait until the next chapter to find out who **the man** is, and because of that, I laugh.

I also hope my tale of Dranzer and the Hiwatari's made sense, and that you understood the way I got them to name him and whatever… it took me a while to think that up! And Kai and Hilary fighting… I couldn't resist!

I kind of lied there at the top, didn't I? There _was_ a small appearance of Tyson…

And this is really cruel and unusual, I know, but I'm going away for two weeks on a trip to Austria to visit my grandparents, and I don't have access to the internet. That's bad for you and I both, minna, because I can't upload anything to ff.net or read any stories and whatnot! [_sigh_]

But we'll live, won't we? And I'll try to get the sixth chapter done while I'm gone so you won't have to wait _so incredibly long_ like last time.

**Ellen**: I've gotta see Meangirls too… Rei's voice actor is in it! And to me, the characters haven't become horribly disfigured in G-Rev, but then that's my opinion faced against yours, isn't it?

**Luna20**: It may have looked like it, but you scared the crap out of me the other day when you popped up out of nowhere when I was obsessing over the fact I couldn't buy my Finger Eleven CD because Music World wasn't there anymore! I mean, wow. It was just so sudden… [_laughs_]

**Kai's Honey**: Yeah, I missed you a lot! I'm glad you got your computer fixed. And yes, there's going to be some KaiHil romance coming up… so I should probably put in

**LoneWolf7423**: Arigatou for the comment! I love "Dust in the Wind" too, as you already know because I'm repeating myself and… eh… I forgot.

**Reprecussion (Reaper of Souls)**: Ooh, you got to read this! But Beyblade isn't American Anime – it's still Japanese – it's just been dubbed. And what kind of fanfiction are _you_ going to write?

Arigatou to all the other reviewers who I haven't made comments to directly – you're still remembered, don't worry! So, until I come back to my computer here in Canada, ja ne, and please leave me a review!


	6. To Be Bombarded With Questions

_Phoenix__ Fallen_: Yea, yea, I know, I'm annoying – how long has it been since I've last updated? Half a year, or something? _sigh_ Wow, I'm a real slacker… blame my teachers! _growls_

Meh, whatever. _winkwink_ I'm really sorry, by the way. I feel **really** bad now… _hides in a corner_

Oh, and for those that have forgotten, we've just left off when Kai catches a glimpse of **the man**. Hope you enjoy this!

---------

_Disclaimer:_ Aoki-san owns Bakuten Shoot Beyblade. Not me. I'm just a fan. This is my story based on his characters and their situations. I just wish Aoki-san would elaborate more on Kai's situation… he's more focused on Takao/Tyson's. Not that I don't like Takao… Kai is just better.

---------

**For Those Who Are Beaten**

**Chapter Six: To Be Bombarded With Questions**

---------

_... How is it that blood can suddenly run so cold?_

Kai's jaw clenched as he felt his insides turn completely icy - just as they had done when witnessing his grandfather charging furiously down on him; when he had psychically begged for acceptance, and silently pleaded to be forgiven for the fact that he couldn't live up to what was expected of him; that he could never be the strong, unafraid warrior that Biovolt was wanting him to be...

The adolescent tensed, realizing, and trying to rid himself of the emotion-drived frost occupying his internal organs, catching a saddened whimper that had begun to erupt in his throat and forcing it back down. Why had he suddenly been brought back to the feelings he had experienced during his fateful departure almost a day ago? He shook himself mentally, forcing his muscles to relax.

_What's wrong with you, Hiwatari? Why have you gone so apprehensive all of a sudden?_ He brought one hand into a gentle fist, squeezing lightly and trying to concentrate on the stabbing flecks of pain it brought as the shining glass shards penetrated deeper into his palm. _Why is it you feel so sick...?_

He glanced up towards the door, watching as Tyson Kinomiya gave a cresent-moon grin that seemed to stretch the perimeters of his face an unbelievable amount; "Kai!" he exclaimed joyfully, and he bounded over, reminding the unfortunate teen of an eager mutt greeting its owner when he comes home, "You're awake! Ah, finally!" The Japanese boy sat himself down at the side of his futon - opposite Hilary - giving him an expectant and excited expression, but Kai couldn't help but ignore him: his dark-honey irises trailed along to focus on another person entering the room, and then...

The dark-haired man locked eyes with him.

His stomach flinched abruptly, his heart rising up into his throat, and despite all his efforts, he froze once again. His chest rose as his lungs desperately filled with air, and he found himself beginning to breathe quite heavily. He fought not to shudder, his muscles becoming taut as he suppressed distraught mewls from escaping his lips, and in the process, found himself becoming nauseous as the pressure built up inside of him.

_... Is it... D-death?_

The thin, awkward thought fragment suddenly made itself apparent in his mind, and refused to budge, no matter how much he tried to push it away. It was... scary. Why _that_ word? Why now?

_You're going insane Hiwatari!_ He growled exasperatedly at himself. _What's with this wave of anxiety all of a sudden? Get a goddamn grip before you begin to lose it completely! You're being stupid; you don't even understand what you're thinking! He is not..._

He let his thought waver as he watched the young adult begin to advance closer towards him.

_... Death...?_

"Hey, Kai? Kaa-aai! Hey, can't you hear me?"

The teen drew a sharp breath of surprise, jerking his head to his right where the Tyson's voice had come from, and a vague slap of pain got him in the temple for doing so. Max and Rei had joined the navy-haired blader's side, and all three of them were giving him wondering looks.

"Are you doing alright?" Rei asked, looking slightly sympathetic.

Kai blinked a few times in surprise, then nodded once, swallowing as he did so. _Calm down - it's just your team_, he tried to tell himself. _They are not the one who broke you; you'll be fine. Just relax, Hiwatari, you're only imagining the trouble..._

"Good morning, Kai," Mr. Dickinson was now in front of his futon, smiling all around as he usually did, "How are you? From what I've heard, you've certainly been through a lot."

He shrugged, averting his eyes onto the blanket covering his lap. He'd been through a lot like this before, although, that was different - that was with Boris, and Boris wasn't one he had trusted; he wasn't the family that had suddenly turned on him; the person who abandoned him in the abbey of stone-cold, Russian winters.

Not that he didn't like the winter: he loved the way weightless snowflakes floated lazily down from the sky, how he would try to catch them in his mouth and experience the toasting sensation of them evaporating on the warmth of his own tongue. He loved trying to keep his balance just to end up sliding around while standing on the ice, and the crunching sound you make as white powder gives way underneath your feet.

Winter even had its own scent as well; it smelt of pure cold, pine needles, smoke from bonfires created to light up the dark and keep you warm at night, freshly baked goods wafting from the stores on the main street of Moscow, and air so crisp and minty that it burns your nose with its own cleanliness.

There was also the thrill of a good snowball fight - building forts as quickly as you could to protect yourself as you engage in battle. Kai remembered these quite fondly, for these were the times in Russia when he and all the other boys fought for fun, and had forgotten all about the strict training, and punishments they were forced into back home in that old church.

Those were the rare times that they - the recruits - were permitted to escape from that horrible building and roam freely, even if it _was_ only to find other bladers to practice their skills on. But the clear sounds of Moscow were calling out, and back then, the young, naive Kai wasn't afraid to bend the rules, and lead every other boy to do the same. But that was before things had started to get serious...

"Kai?" Hilary whispered timidly, snapping the negative thought train that had begun to consume him once again, "Are you sure you're okay? You keep..." she paused, her rich, ruby irises big and filled with concern, "You keep zoning out."

He said nothing, completely aware of the numerous pairs of eyes that were focusing on only him. He sighed, _she's right. I can't even hear them talking to me anymore._

"Kai," Mr. Dickinson began softly, "I'd like to introduce you to someone." the teen raised his head with a hint of difficulty, watching as the elder gestured to the young adult nest to him, "This is Azra Black. He was the one who brought you here."

The next thing escaping the youths mouth surprised near everyone in the room, including himself.

"I know," he heard himself plainly say, though on the inside, his mind churned in panic and suspicion.

_Hiwatari, what in hell are you doing?!_ He yelled internally at himself,_ you don't know this man, why would you say that?_ He gazed over to the adult, watching him smile gently in recognition, and wondered: _why would he play along with this? Do I actually...?_

The one now known to him as Azra Black knelt down beside Hilary, balancing himself on the back of his heels, his features calm, serene, and strangely familiar. He reached out with one hand, and with the slightest hesitation, the teen leaned forwards took it in his own.

_You're face, your actions... even your name makes me feel like I really **do** know you from somewhere. _He began to wonder as he stared into the rich irises of the male opposite himself. _And somehow I can't help but suspect that... I can't help but think that youknow that I can hardly remember. And you do... don't you...?_

And somewhere there was an emitting - a penetrating into his thoughts - and he heard a soft chuckle: _"And I know everything else as well..."_

His eyes widened, and he gasped sharply the second he made physical contact with the young man, withdrawing his whole arm immediately and protectively holding it close to his chest. The moment they had touched, it felt like a jolt of electricity had run straight through him, and then... _There was another voice in my head_, he whimpered frantically to himself, _why was there another voice in my head?_

"Sorry, are you okay?" Azra asked, his eerie aura disappearing completely - evaporating into nothingness that he, if he could stop remembering, would forget was even there - and he was suddenly back to being the kind, generous, twenty-year-old who had carried him here, "I forgot: your hands are hurt."

Kai blinked in slight confusion, his brain still desperately trying to register what had just happened, then slowly lowered his hand down in front of him: his palm glistened in separate pools of deep red as bloody pinpricks grew, vibrantly dotting his skin's surface, and slowly dripping downwards to meld with one another. He bit his lip lightly, only now realizing the pain he had caused himself by the brief handshake.

"You hurt your hands?" Tyson craned his neck forwards to see, letting out a small grunt of surprise, "Wow, Kai, how'd you do_ that_?"

At this comment, Hilary's own hand shot forwards, grabbing the ends of his fingers where they weren't slashed and quickly pulled his whole limb closer to her so she could look at his wounds. She frowned, and when she looked up at him, her expression showed she was truly sorry for him, "How _did_ you do that?"

"I..." he paused, watching the tiny red flecks swell and merge into one another, "I fell... on glass."

"Glass?" Max leaned forwards as well.

He nodded once, "China... from a broken vase."

There was a period of silence.

"What about all your other cuts and bruises?" it was Rei's turn to ask something now, "How'd you get those? Were you in a fight, or something?"

The adolescent exhaled, saying nothing. What was he supposed to tell them anyway? Did they really want to hear him say that his grandfather beat the crap out of him yesterday morning? Besides, they'd never let him go back if they knew...

Another question formed, but by who, he wasn't even trying to know: "Where were you going when you were walking out in the rain?"

There was a long silence, partly because not even Kai knew the answer to _that_, and the last inquiry was dropped as another emerged from someone else: "_Why _were you walking out in the rain? I mean, why didn't you just go home, or something?"

The boy's insides flinched, and his thoughts trailed backwards just to remind himself why, but still, nothing was heard escaping his lips.

"C'mon, Kai, you can tell us! We're your teammates; your friends!"

"Yeah, Kai. Why're you beat up so bad?"

Unchanging. He remained unchanging in expression and reply; a silent, slightly out of tune character whom which the words 'stoic' and 'brooding' had most probably evolved. He didn't move, and he hardly blinked, contemplating on how he had ended up in this mess.

"Kai," Mr. Dickinson began, "Please. Maybe we can help."

_Maybe you can't help - you'll only make things worse between my grandfather and I if you decide to intervene_. The teen's thoughts swirled spitefully, creating a maelstrom of frustration and grief; _I already know he's not going to enjoy the fact that I've been cared for here, but he'll hate me forever if I tell you! You're not going to help, you're going to-_

His crimson-brown irises began to trail upwards and to his left as he interrupted himself, for something was applying pressure to his hand. He looked over, remembering that Hilary was holding it in her own, and found her giving him a light, encouraging smile, pleading for him to speak. He frowned slightly; _they aren't going to leave me alone, are they?_ He growled irritatingly at himself. _Might as well tell them something..._

Exhaling, he finally muttered, "I fell."

Everyone in the room glanced to one another, and the elderly man continued, "Where did you fall?"

"I..." he felt his toes curl in slight resentment as he felt the brunette girl give him another reassuring squeeze under his fingers, "I fell down a staircase."

Tyson cocked an eyebrow skeptically, "How do you get _that_ hurt from falling down stairs?"

Kai shot him a glare, resisting the urge to smack him, because obviously, he had never fallen down the stairs before, "Because he threw a - " he began angrily, but he cut himself off abruptly, catching his sentence in his throat before he could finish it.

"Was it," the soft, masculine vocals of Azra Black reached his ears once again, and he turned to face him, "Was it the same person who told you to run?"

Kai stared at him for a while, a mixed feeling of trust and suspicion rising inside of him, "Yeah," he breathed quietly, "It was."

"And did he throw something at you because you didn't want to go?"

On the inside, he winced. Was this Azra just getting some lucky guesses, or did he really know? Still in his head he could hear his grandfather's harsh voice as he uttered the syllables: _"Stupid boy. Get out of my house!" _It hurt so unbelievably much - the fact that he wasn't wanted.

"Is this true, Kai?" Mr. Dickinson asked, looking down with a hint of sadness in his expression, "Did this really happen?"

He tensed, and the room was almost dead silent. _This is getting too far_, he commented, _think up something quickly, Hiwatari, or they'll begin to suspect it was him..._

"Kai -"

"There were five of them," he blurted, faking a sudden crumbling under the pressure they put him under, "We were in the abandoned warehouse, on the far side of an open field, behind some paper and mechanics factories."

The old man before him raised his eyebrows, probably surprised at his abrupt 'confession', "What were you doing there?"

He shrugged, his mind racing as he built himself a convincing enough story, "Just... talking."

"And what inspired them to throw something at you?"

He frowned, for he knew they were probably thinking it was only the vase that had been chucked in his direction instead of the table too, "We... didn't agree on a few things."

Tyson tilted his head to one side in his inquiry, "Like what?"

"I..." his brow furrowed, his frown not fading, "We had made some deals a while back - before this team existed - and I wasn't willing to live up to my part of the agreement anymore."

"That was when you were a part of that gang, the Shell Sharks, am I correct?" Mr. Dickinson continued.

The boy gave an internal growl as he nodded,_ will they ever stop asking me things?_

"Is that all that happened?"

He paused, debating with himself whether or not to add more details to his story, but finally decided against it - it would make things too complicated, and he might not remember all he had said when he was asked to confirm things in the future. That was the problem with most liars - they didn't know when to stop, and by the time they did, they had weaven something too confusing, and would end up getting found out. But luckily, this male had perfected the art of delusion when he was younger; something he owed to Boris and all his rules.

"Yeah," he murmured, his eyes attached to the floor, "That's it."

The old man sighed heavily, straightening from his slightly bent over position he had unconsciously taken on whilst listening, "Alright then, Kai," the shown emotions upon his face were faint and gentle, "You had better get some rest now."

The teen slowly let out a breath he had been unknowingly holding, silently agreeing. Near exhausted, he looked upwards, watching as everyone stood up - every pair of eyes watching him in concern - and one by one, headed to the sliding door and disappeared into the backyard of the Kinomiya dojo.

"Good luck, Hiwatari Kai," Azra Black spoke in almost a whisper as he left, "I'll see you again soon."

He froze in repeat: _good luck...? To be seen again... soon?_ But before he could ponder on it any longer, another voice seared through the calm: "Kai?"

Hilary was lingering in the doorway, leaning her head against the frame so that he could only see half her face, "You can't do everything yourself." she paused, her expression turning troubled, "We're here for you... okay?"

He gazed at her, feeling a bit unsure; "Okay," he told her.

She smiled softly, "I'll be close by; don't be afraid to call if you need something," and then, just like the others, she disappeared too.

Kai sat there motionless, staring at the exact place where she had just been. He frowned suddenly, slumping down into his futon, pulling the covers tightly around him, shutting his eyes forcefully.

"Don't be afraid," he scoffed, muttering, "Don't be... afraid."

---------

_Phoenix__ Fallen_: That's right, Hiwatari! Don't be afraid! _giggles_ Oh, he is such a cutie. Thanks to all you reviewers (84 reviews! Huzzah!), I love you all!

Actually, this was the second version of this chapter (just so you know!). I had written two different versions, and this turned out to be the better one – the two are **VERY** different. The other one was bad, but I don't know why. So, I just started from scratch again. Heh heh heh…

So, here are two questions you may like to ponder until I come again with the next chapter…

Why does Kai think of _Death _around this Azra fellow? That sure is random… yay randomness!

What'll happen next?! Will Kai meet his grandfather and patch things up? Or will he just deal with his problem from afar? Or will he just forget about his issues at home and try to live as normally as he can?

Oh man! This is killing me, all these questions! _laughs_ You must hate me right now… but that's okay. _grin_

Yeah, I'm gonna go watch _Tim Burton's The Nightmare Before Christmas_ now (I adore Jack; he's so charming! And Sally is such a sweetheart!).

Leave me a review! Bai bai!


End file.
